


Won't Let You Go

by Emmeline_Arden



Series: Stephen Strange Bingo 2019 - queenslytherclaw [1]
Category: Doctor Strange (2016), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Death, Don’t copy to another site, Everyone Gets A Hug, Everyone Needs A Hug, Fluff, Hugs, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Memories, Night Terrors, Not of either of them, Post-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Sadness, Wedding Talk, the snap
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-15
Updated: 2019-04-15
Packaged: 2020-01-14 15:12:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,373
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18478813
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Emmeline_Arden/pseuds/Emmeline_Arden
Summary: Stephen saw way too much shit when he lived through the future and the horrors of what could have been haunt him in his sleep. Luckily, he's got Tony there to help him ward off his nightmares.





	Won't Let You Go

**Author's Note:**

> This fills the "Night Terror" square on my bingo card.
> 
> Thanks for reading, darlings! Don't forget to comment (please I love the comments)!  
> XOXO,  
> Emmeline

_He looked up at Tony, knowing the end was approaching, and he was so_ sorry. _"Tony, there was no other way."_ I'm sorry _, he thought as he faded into darkness._ I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. _There was no other way. And he was falling through darkness, watching half of the universe dissolve into little particles of ash, over and over. He watched Wakanda fall to the Outriders so many times he thought it was burned into his brain. And he watched Peter die in Tony's arms, watched him plead with Death herself, "Please no, I don't want to go-". Worst of all was Tony._

_His sweet, amazing, selfless Tony sacrificing himself and saving the rest of the universe with one snap of his fingers. Tony fading, not turning to ashes, just slowly fading out of existence._ No, no, it's not real, I know it's not real,  _he thought, but still he saw it over and over again, fourteen million different ways. Every single time they lost, Tony had died, and he had died in increasingly horrible ways, repeating until Stephen could no longer breathe, because that was_ his Tony. _His Tony, dying of Stephen's own damn selfishness, because he refused to give Thanos the Time Stone. Tony dying for no other reason than a single wrong move, halfway across the universe in Wakanda. Tony, gasping out his last breaths around a gaping hole in chest, or crushed underneath the rubble of a moon, or struggling in Thanos' stranglehold and succumbing at last to darkness._

_Stephen was helpless to the sight of his Tony dying, because it wasn't fear. It wasn't a nightmare. It was his memory, it was real, from when they were on Titan and he had used the Time Stone to live out every single future possibility he could. He felt something cold and wet dripping down his face, and he realized he was crying, unable to bear the sight of his Tony, broken and dead. His knees buckled as he sank to the ground, sobbing silently as Tony died at Thanos' hands, again, and again, and again._

"Hey, hey, hey, Stephen, wake up, please wake up,"  _he could hear a voice, soft and soothing and oh-so-familiar._ "It's alright, it's me, it's Tony. Come back to me, love,"  _Stephen was still sobbing for all he was worth, but he was calming down slowly, remembering that his Tony was alive._

"Stephie, please, it's okay, you're okay, I'm okay. Come on, love, you can do it. Come back to me,  _please,_  Stephen. I'm right here with you, I'm alive, just come back to me." Tony's voice gently tugged him from his memories, and Stephen's eyes flew open with a weak gasp. His eyes darted around, trying to focus, but then they landed on Tony. Safe and sound. Stephen sagged into Tony's arms, breathing hard. Slowly, he realized that they were in their bed, the lights off and the fan whirring. 

"Tony," he spoke, gulping around the name. "You're alive." Tony's face darkened at the words, and he smiled down sadly at Stephen.

"Yeah, love, I am. So are you, in case you were wondering." His halfhearted attempt at humour fell flat in the silence of the room, but it didn't matter. He was just trying to cope, the best way he knew how.

Stephen took Tony's hand in his own and gripped it tightly. "We're okay, and we'll stay that way. Right?"

"Right. No dying here!" They both smiled a bit and held each other tight, relishing in having each other and still being alive. "Stephen?"

"Yeah, Tony?"

"What did you see?" He wasn't asking about the dreams, not really, even though every night saw Stephen waking up past midnight, sobbing from them.

"Mmmmmm, I saw a lot, Tony. I think I saw too much, really. I . . . There were so many possibilities, and I - well, I can't exactly see the future. I can only live it." Stephen was rubbing his thumb over the back of Tony's hand, his movements quick and frantic, as if it was the last time he'd ever touch him.

"You had to go through that? Fuck, I thought just seeing it would have been awful, but you had to actually live through it, live through us losing?"

"Fourteen million, six hundred and five different times. I watched you die, Tony. It was senseless and it was terrifying and yet I would do it again, because it meant that I saved you. You're still alive, and we're together." Stephen meant every word of it, too. He'd do anything if it meant Tony came out the other end alive and well.

"You - you watched me die, that many times? You watched us lose, and lose, and lose, and yet you managed to come back to me and fight your way through another time. You're so incredible, love." Tony was staring at Stephen with - wonder? awe? - Stephen wasn't sure, but he could guess.

"Yes, well, it was about the  _worst_ fourteen million, six hundred and five lifetimes I've ever lived through," Stephen said, grimacing at the memory. "I had to save the rest of you idiotic superheroes. And you lot had  _no fucking idea_ how to beat Thanos. Honestly, that stupid ex-boyfriend of yours tried to wrestle Thanos to death," he grumbled. 

"Well, now I've got you, and you're the smartest, most capable wizard in the universe," Tony smiled softly at Stephen. "And I happen to think, the best boyfriend, too."

"Hey, hey, I quite believe that honor belongs to  _you_ , Mr. Handsome," he made a kissy face at Tony, not quite teasing because he really  _did_  want to kiss him. Stephen wanted to hold Tony and never let go, just stay in his embrace for all eternity. Maybe then he could protect Tony from death itself.

Obviously noticing the way Stephen's eyes had dimmed with sadness for a moment, Tony leaned down close to his face. "I've got you, honey-pie. And I will  _not_  let you go. That is a promise," he said solemnly, all mirth dropped from his visage.

Stephen gaped at the words from Tony. He had not once made a promise before, not to anyone. He'd explained it once, saying he'd been brought up thinking of himself as a failure, and he refused to make promises he knew he couldn't keep due to that. This was serious. Still, he couldn't help but blush and lean up to capture Tony's lips with his own, gripping his hand firmly as they kissed.

They paused for a breath and Tony cupped Stephen's face in his hands, gazing into his eyes like he'd built the stars, and he didn't say anything. He just looked, and Stephen could almost feel Tony's love, he could see it in his eyes, and there was  _so much_ of it. "Really?" He asked despite himself.

"Yes, love. I'm yours, and you are mine, and I won't let anything take that from me, not if I have to rip apart planets with my bare hands," his gaze was piercing, but comforting, and Stephen kissed him again, happy to be Tony's and for Tony to be his.

Tony broke the kiss, smiling, and said, "Well, as much as I'd like to kiss you for the rest of time, it  _is_ three in the morning, and I promised Pepper I'd go to a meeting tomorrow morning."

"Wow, that's an improvement." Stephen commented dryly.

"Hey, I am a responsible adult! I have gone to four whole meetings this year! That's a lot."

"Sure, Tony," Stephen said, maneuvering them into a more comfortable position. "If you really do have a meeting tomorrow, let's go to bed."

"That's just what I was suggesting, love," Tony said. Stephen started to curl himself around Tony, but he blocked Stephen. "Nope, none of that. I am hugging  _you_  tonight, and you are going to have wonderful dreams about our big gay wedding we're gonna have!"

Stephen raised an eyebrow at the outburst. "Not that I don't love the idea, but when, exactly, did you propose?"

"I didn't. Now go to bed, idiot."

Stephen fell asleep quickly, comforted by his boyfriend's warmth, and he did indeed dream of their "big gay wedding," as Tony put it.

**Author's Note:**

> Comment if you liked it! They are writer fuel.


End file.
